Life… in acceptance.
Life gives us terms beyond what we can see or touch, except reality is we feel. Resonating in a foreign space of what is imagined vs what is tangible. We feel when things are going alright and feel when things are just out of sorts, so why is there a struggle of acceptance?
Accepting reality whatever that reality may be is the accepting something outside of ourselves or something that is beyond our grasp. The idea that we can make something not so is difficult to embrace and the sooner we embrace we become clear in what needs to be done. When a horse breaks down physically, emotionally or worse yet both, my heart shatters. Where I come in this pendulum of struggling is that in fact true at that moment, could it be that what I see is the manifestation or just occurred, my mind races in thousands of what ifs. The hardest days are when I wake up the next day realizing that life is crystal clear that the loss is the loss, right now and that has two options- 1. Acceptance or 2. Rejection.
God’s reality, horse’s reality and my reality.
In noticing where I struggle it comes down to whose reality am I choosing to be in, God’s, horse’s or my own?
God’s reality is everything outside of the other two. God has divine, all knowing standards of what is going on and there is nothing that I can do to change this- the weather, the rocks forming, grass turning green and so many choices that are beyond my grasp. Yes, yes I know, I can water the grass, doesn’t mean the sun shows up though. In time, I have developed such an understanding that God is everything, everything we touch, everything we that is experienced in life, problem is: we have a tough time without having a stressful attachment to the situation. Our experiences are our teachers so gracefully placed for our space.
Horse’s reality- their muscle development can improve in conditioning or tear to shreds. The bones develop based upon their breed, except not all horses in the same breed are the same height no matter how much I would hope that they are shorter or taller for that matter. The lineage has a baseline “idea” of what an offspring should be capable of or what the benefit of the lines show, except we have all seen in every discipline a horse defy the odds, the upsets by the underdogs and the monopoly play out as the dice is rolled. The mind can be strong or weak, except whom am I to make this call, this is all a matter of perception. Humans relay, “this horse is weak” only for my impression, this “this horse shows strength” so which one of us is ‘right’? I have found that we as humans, have no input on a horse in the inhale of a breath and that on the exhale we have every input on a horse. So as sit in the swing on a horse’s business, I am the student as I just sit back and breathe to see clearly everything a horse will offer.
Then last part of this reality equation, my reality. For the last 15 years, I have felt barricaded to the shattering of what my position is in a horse’s world until just recently medical results have come back showing actual reality. My heart has become crushed, at least once, except probably more ways that I wish to disclose. There are days I feel strength and that physically my heart is being mended, other days is a different story to share. My heart has gone through the gamut of pain to joy and all experiences in-between. Reality is, as of now, my heart is beating and I must apply resources to allow this muscle to continue in living. My space of allowing a beat after beat to embrace.
There is the one central muscle to every living species. This muscle that every single being needs to continue to allow a space for empathy, compassion, light to be shown and to experience grief.
The heart is multi-dimensional.
As I sit in my quiet moments, literally in the space of a horse, I can feel life.
Life in full loud and quiet space. Life in nano seconds, as I capture the image. Life in finding that time has no time. Life in mind and of course the heart. Good gracious am I grateful for the LIFE that my heart continues in, through mud and clear water. This is all beautiful in seeing the moments.
Until there is peace, we have work to do- teachers are always around us, grateful my work is always there to see clearly.
All in Love to you & your horses,
Lisa @ Bonito Cheval